Jul. 16, 2018

The Teachings of the Internet

The Internet

In the days of technologies, I sit back and ponder what we’ve learned.

– We’ve learned to snack. Every time we sit down at the computer anymore, it seems we need something to nibble on.

– We learned to be adventurous. We post pictures on social media of meals we eat once in a while to give the illusion that we eat like this all the time.

– We’ve learned how to scam people out of their money. We know that someone is eventually going to click on these pop-up ads, spam, or false stories (IE: my brother Keith).

– We’ve learned how to air our dirty laundry. Before social media, no one had any clue as to what was going on in a person’s life unless they bumped into each other, made a phone call, or ran into someone’s mother. Now, we know every time a couple gets divorced, why they’re getting divorced, and why the children should not be with the other evil parent.

– We’ve learned not all celebrities are dead – Prince, Robin Williams and Elvis live!

– We’ve learned we’re not getting Alzheimer’s because of all the passwords we have to remember. The new rule of thumbs: If you can remember your login IDs and PWs you don’t have Alzheimer’s Disease.

– We’ve learned that everyone else is aging, but not us. Reviewing my high school yearbook I see that many of my old pals have gotten so gray and wrinkled except for me; I’m still the stunning homecoming queen I always was (cough).

– We have learned to be insecure with ourselves. The internet has created a community of liars. People lie about their height, weight, wealth, and/or worth. Some have even lied about their gender. As for me, I’ve always maintained that I was a four-foot-two troll with one tooth, but it was a gold tooth.

You have to love the internet, though. It’s brought us so much, changed so much, and created so much in our lives, both good and bad.