Stories About My Family & Friends
We had a lunch date with someone who has a difficult time walking and often resorts to her cane for support. We were supposed to meet with her for lunch one afternoon on Front Street (Her, my husband, and me). We had decided the River Room would be our meeting spot.
My husband suggested she just pull up, get out, and just let him park her car for her so, she would not have that far to walk. I thought it was quite a thoughtful idea so I called her.
As the phone is ringing, she drives by and my husband says, “There she goes.”
She doesn’t answer so, I call again. “There she goes again,” my husband announces. She’s still not answering so I call a third time.
“There she is.”
She had parked the car and was walking toward us. I was so exasperated. I told her why I kept calling, but she thought it was the doctor’s office telling her to come on in they’d work her in to see the doctor.
“Uhm, no… they will not ever do that,” I explained. “They will call you one time, one time only and if you don’t answer, you’ll be lucky to get a voicemail that they even bothered to call.”
As we were leaving, my husband offered to go and get the car for her. She handed him the keys and told him which was for the door and the one for the ignition. My husband takes the keys as she adds jokingly, “Now, it’s that royal blue Mercedes parked outside.”
Several minutes later, he pulls up and she gets in her car. As she’s pulling away we notice her flashers are still blinking and he says, “Should we call and tell her?”
“Nope,” I answer. “She’ll figure it out and even if she doesn’t, she’s not going to answer the damn phone anyway.”
While getting into our car he says, “Did she say she drives a royal blue Mercedes?”
“What are you talking about?” I ask before remembering her parting comment to him when she gave him the key. “Why?”
With a note of irritation he says, “Because I was out here looking for a blue Mercedes!”
“What! You saw what she was driving, you know very well she does not have a Mercedes,” I exclaimed. “She was joking!”
Shaking his head and laughing at himself a little, he added, “Well, I found what I thought was her truck and I went to unlock the door with the key she said to use.”
“...And?” I prompted.
“And, the windows were down.”
I started laughing at this point. “You are both going to drive me nuts,” I say as I continue to laugh.
“I wasn’t sure if it was hers because I kept thinking blue...Mercedes...truck, but I got in anyway and tried the ignition,” he said of his situation. “It turned over and I went ahead and backed out.”
“What would you have done if it wasn’t her truck?”
“Taken it back and left a note apologizing,” he answered.
The next day, Irene calls me and says, “I was driving around town all day with my flashers blinking. I couldn’t figure out why everyone was so nice as they kept their distance and they even let me change lanes with no problem. Finally, someone told me my blinkers were flashing.”
I have laughed so hard over these two; they’re two peas in a pod. It was a good day.
One Saturday, we’d gone to a couple of community yard sales. We had our two-year old granddaughter with us. I had brought a couple of snacks for her to chew on during the day. However, I forgot to eat something myself.
My blood sugar tanked on me in a big way. I ate a couple of Jolly Ranchers® and it brought my glucose level back up. An hour later, it happened again. Usually, when my blood sugar drops, my body gets exhausted trying to keep my sugar up so, I need to nap even if for only 15 minutes which I did not do either time.
Normally, I would walk around the neighborhood, but this time (because of my situation) we would have to ride down the block. I also told Grandpa not to even bother snapping my granddaughter in the car seat as we were only going five houses down the street.
“What do you want me to do with her?”
“Bring her over here, let her sit in my lap,” I answered. “Its five houses away, we’re going 2 MPH, I think she’ll be alright.”
By the time we got there, this child had gone through the console, the glove compartment, looked on the floor, asked “Momo Purse?”, found the dome lights, and opened the sunroof in the car.
When we left that house, Grandpa was going to put the things Momo (me) got into the back seat. She was with him as he carried the things to my side of the car. Needless to say, she tried to get in the front seat with me.
Grandpa told her, “No, no… we’re getting in the car seat.”
Granddaughter: “Don’t want it.”
Grandpa: “We have to get in the car seat so we can go bye-bye. We’re leaving.”
With minimal reluctance, she went to the other side of the car. Grandpa’s mistake was opening the driver’s side first before putting her in the car seat.
You should have seen those eyes light up! She thought for sure she hit the jackpot and now she was going to push all those buttons that Grandpa (Papa) pushes when he sits up there.
Grandpa: “No, no, we need to get back here. “
Granddaughter: “Don’t want it. Climb in, I’ll get it! I’ll get it!”
All I could do was chuckle. I was so wiped out, she could have driven the car and there would have been nothing I could have done to stop her. I did finally manage a nap (both of us did), however, because I waited too long to rejuvenate my body, I was dragging along the rest of the day. She, on the other hand, was still having a ball when I talked to my daughter later that evening around eight.
Toddlers… God knew what he was doing when he gave them to young people. Whew!
My granddaughter is such a card! Her mother has a table behind the sofa that is covered in pictures. Holly knows she is not allowed to touch them so she did what any other normal baby would do while Grandma was babysitting; she went for the pictures.
Part of her play area is by the patio doors which are behind the sofa. I noticed it got really quiet which was suspicious. I called her name out and didn’t get the usual baby babble so I got up to look. This child…!
I came around the corner and said, “What are you doing?”
With her head down (as if she were really ashamed), she held up her little hand with a piece of paper in it and handed it to me.
“Where did you get this from?” I asked, not recognizing the paper.
In answer, her little hand shot up again (head still tucked) and she handed me the back of a picture frame.
“Holly, you know you’re not supposed to touch Mommy’s pictures,” I scolded.
As if I had not just finished admonishing her, she happily crawled away to the file folders her parents keep by the TV cabinet. She knows she’s not supposed to touch them, either. She had already spread them out on the floor a couple times earlier and I had picked them up unceremoniously.
While I put the picture back into the frame and set it on the table, Holly crawled over to the file folders again stood up, reached over and snatched all of them, and tossed them onto the floor. Then she crawled over to them and sat on her knees in front of the mess she’d just created.
I came back around the sofa and said, “Now, Holly, you know you’re not allowed to touch those, either.”
At which time, this child threw herself down and sprawled out on top of them. Then she looked up at me and grinned. I could only stand there looking at her as I shook my head. She’s almost 18 months now and she’s already got a head start on the terrible twos.
I calmly picked up the folders, sat back on the sofa, and smiled to myself. If Holly isn’t her mother all over, I don’t know what she is. Yup, the mother’s curse is in full swing. Welcome to the terrible twos and soon-to-be trying threes my sweet little girl.
I don’t drink, smoke, or do drugs. I have to say my worst vice is I have a potty mouth so when my granddaughter learned a new word; the “S” word, I figured everyone would look at me.
When I told my daughter about her new word she laughed and said, “I thought that’s what she was saying, but wasn’t sure. I don’t know where she got it from, though.”
“She didn’t get it from over here,” I told her. “You know me, go big or go home so if she’s not dropping the ‘F-Bomb’ it didn’t come from here.”
My granddaughter has got her mommy and daddy wrapped! Not me, though, or Grandpa. We’re not falling for that sweetness routine.
My daughter recently called me and was trying hard to talk to me, but you could hear the baby in the background. All the while, Amber was interrupted and kept addressing my granddaughter, who I affectionately call, Angel Pie.
My poor daughter was saying, “No...Stop that…Give that back...You can’t have that...Come back here!”
“What’s wrong, honey?” I asked into the phone as I was enjoying every bit of the mother’s curse.
With exasperation, Amber snaps, “Angel Pie is not behaving!”
I can relate. She is her mother’s daughter. Amber thinks she’s not listening now; just wait until she hits those teenage years and the eye roll is permanently installed.