Mar. 25, 2017

Salad Bowls

Jeff Foxworthy tells a redneck joke: “You might be a redneck if you have an entire set of salad bowls that are a collection of Cool Whip bowls.”

My son and I just look at each other and laugh. Here’s the salad bowl story:

I had made spaghetti for dinner one night and my son fixed a bowl for lunch the next day with the leftovers. As he reached up and grabbed a Cool Whip bowl, my husband started complaining.

“What,” my son asked noting his father’s look of displeasure.

“Don’t use those bowls,” Dad demanded, “They leave tomato stains inside! Find something else.”

In his own defense my son asked, “What do you want me to use? We don’t have any glass bowls with tops. Maybe you’d prefer I used one of these fancier Churn Style butter bowls instead?”

Grumbling and muttering under his breath my husband retorts, “I don’t know! Find something but don’t use those bowls!”

He used the bowl anyway.

Speaking of the butter bowls; in a separate incident, I remember yelling about them. I was pulling something out of the cabinet one day and noticed we had like ten butter bowls and six Cool Whip bowls. “Why are we collecting all these damn bowls,” I yelled in frustration. “Do we really need that many?”

My husband storms into the kitchen and snatches all of the butter bowls and Cool Whip bowls out of the cabinet, stomps off to the recycling bin outside the front door, and slams them down into the bucket. After which (he was having a bad day), he proceeds to snap at me, “There, are you happy now?”

I leaned up against the counter in the kitchen and watched him do all this without saying a word. I knew he wasn’t serious because he didn’t take all the lids that went to the bowls with him to the trash.

Later, my son comes in, sees all of the bowls in the recycling bin and asks me what happened. I told him about his father’s little temper tantrum. My son throws his hands up and says, “Great! What am I supposed to use for spaghetti now? He threw all of our fancy-dancy bowls out!”

“It’s okay, Son,” I say soothingly. “They’ll all be put back in the cabinet within a few days.”

Three days later, I go to get a bowl down from the cabinet and lo and behold, I have four butter bowls and six Cool Whip bowls up there. I shake my head as I close the cabinet door. We had our fancy salad bowls back. I just thanked God that it wasn’t all ten of the fancier butter bowls.